I hate so much...today.

I just need to vent....

Things I hate:

1. My annoying officemate. She's always too hot or too cold. She opens the windows when I'm cold, she doesn't ever change the tape for the server, she's totally the "teacher's pet," and she takes two hour lunches like she deserves to.
   
2. I hate my mom. She knows exactly how to piss me off, especially when she says comments like "You sure don't look like you've lost weight," and "You should change, no guy is going to look at you in a t-shirt and shorts." Thanks mom, there goes my self-esteem. She made me cry last night. I hate her.
3. Floozy, my other officemate. She bought me a sundae at Ben & Jerry's, and then minutes later, decided to let me know how "redundant" my writing is, and what I should fix, even though SHE IS NOT MY BOSS!
4. I hate living at home. I resent that I have to take my 9-year-old brother to summer camp everyday while my other brother gets to sleep in because he was out too late the night before. I'm late everyday because of this but no one cares. FML.
   
5. My life. Clearly I'm unhappy today.

I wish I could embrace my inner petulant child and run away.

That Girl

We all have this friend. You know, the one that instigates things, that convinces you to get out of your pjs and go out, that makes you have one more shot when you don't think you can, that dares you to do something crazy, and that makes you feel alive. I have one of those friends from college, and I miss her. She was one of the reasons why I didn't graduate from college a semester early. I'm glad I didn't, because I had the best semester ever with her. She was the one who encouraged me to drink before staff meetings, to bitch about life over a glass of wine, and showed me that partying can be fun, no matter where we were. She encouraged me when I didn't know what I had to offer, and was always there for a good laugh.

Jen & I circa 2007 in NYC

I miss her not only because of her sarcasm, but also because here in D-town I don't have that type of friend. And man, sometimes I really wish I did. Especially when I feel old. I heart my circle of friends, don't get me wrong. But sometimes I wish I could be more crazy, without having to feel stupid or immature. I don't want to be the "boozer" of the group, forcing people to drink. I don't want to plan on getting wasted. I want it to come naturally. Maybe I'm looking to relive some parts of my college years, but I'm not entirely sure about that. I mean, I'm definitely responsible, and I know my limits, which unfortunately have changed dramatically in the past year or so. I used to be able to handle 4 drinks a night. Now I get through 2 and I'm done. Which isn't bad either, because that just saves me money because I don't have to buy a bunch of drinks. Anyways, the point is, I'm on the lookout for a drinking buddy...any takers?

TGIF

Plans for this weekend:

1. Get wasted/have fun tonight at a party.
2. Revise my cover letter & apply for a job or two or three
3. Go to jazz in the park on Sunday
4. Take the dog for a walk. She'll love me forever for it.

What are your plans?

Words.

One time at a retreat I went to we went around the room and offered what word(s) people have used to describe us. Sometimes I pay attention to the things that happen around me, and in the past week I've been called a few words that I'd like to share.

Adventurous- I was called this last week while at dinner with my mom and some family friends from Tennessee. I was telling them about how I went to Paris last year with friends, and how I went to Seattle last month by myself. "Wow, you're adventurous," he said. I never thought of myself as adventurous. When I think of that word, I picture someone skydiving or climbing up Mt. Everest. That's adventurous, but I guess traveling in general, whether it's alone or with friends, can be too.

Self sufficient- Last week while I was moving boxes from our old office into the truck, my boss called me self sufficient because while I was carrying a heavy box and managed to open the door by myself, even though she offered to open it for me. I do agree. I am self sufficient. I pay my own bills, and have a full time job. And will hopefully become a homeowner next year. I value my independence, yet I know when to ask for help and input from others.

Adorable- I'm not sure what this word means. Dictionary.com defines it as "very attractive or delightful; charming; worthy of being adored." Two different boys described me as this. I didn't say anything overly gagtastic or sappy. I was just talking normally. But I'm guessing if two different people used this word, that's good right? I mean, it's a good word. It's better than bad words. So, I guess I'm adorable too.


Now I'm curious about ya'll. Tell me, what word(s) have people used to describe you?

Dating 101

Everyone in the blogosphere seems to be serious today so I'm going to delve into myself for a moment too.

Today I had several epiphanies, but I'm going to share this one: I suck at dating. Now, usually when I date it's because of the attention. I like having control of the situation, and I like being able to reject the other person instead of vice versa. But today I realized that while dating can be fun, dating can also lead to a relationship, which can lead to the M word--marriage.

I realized that whoever I date, I should want to spend time with them. And have stuff in common. You'd think this would be painfully dating 101 info but sometimes it takes me awhile for things to sink in. I realized this, when I was hanging out with a boytoy over the weekend. Sure we had great physical chemistry and I liked being wined and dined, but when it came to actual conversation- we really had nothing to talk about. He claimed he was tired. I just looked around and people watched because I had nothing to say either. I also hate that he is so messy, which he blames on his roommates. And I hate that he watches comedy central. I'd rather waste my time watching any other channel. Seriously.

Given that ephinany, I am going to make more of a conserted effort to distinguish what I want. If I want the attention, I might as well just hook up with them. But if I want a date, I should have higher standards. Granted, you don't always know the person before you date them, so in that case, I'll play it by ear. But at least now that I'm aware of this I can change. At least I think so.

Weekend Recap

Whew, this weekend was a doozy.

Friday: Didn't work very hard. We back issues in our old office, so we lugged those in and out of a truck which took two hours. After that I met up with S, whom I haven't seen in forever. I had a mini freak out earlier in the day because his text said we, and I thought, oh no, what if he has a girlfriend? What if it's awkward and I'm the 3rd wheel? So I finally asked him if he was bringing anyone else, and he said no. Whew. Crisis averted. We caught up over Phillycheese steaks and PBR at Denver Ted's. He seemed like the same guy I remembered, only a little bit more serious. After that I went to JCPenney's and bought new Levi's, a jean skirt, and a black skirt. Then pretty much passed out.

Saturday: I was lazy. I slept in, talked with various people on the phone, and watched tv. Oh, and I made mac & cheese for lunch. Yum. Then I was productive and took my dry cleaning to the cleaners. I've been meaning to do that, oh...for like a month now. Better late than never, right? Right. After that I went downtown for the Greek festival. Now, last year, we met a random lady in her 40s, who bought us all like 5 rounds of ouzo. Needless to say I was wasted. But this year, I came into it thinking, no, I will not be wasted. I will control myself. So we all ate food, then had our one shot of ouzo followed by a Greek beer. And then this group of Italians sat at the table with us. Tom, the old guy in the middle just kept talking to me (again, why do old guys always hit on me???) Before I knew it, they had wine, and I had wine, and then it was 10pm, and I had consumed enough alcohol. Needless, to say, it was a great night.

L to R: K, Me, M, and Jake.

L to R: Italian's wife, Tom, other old guy, me & K.

Sunday: Slept in, ate lunch at the Cherry Cricket, and then spent the evening celebrating Father's Day with my uncle at Jazz at the Park. I'm so tired, but not really hungover. Just really dehydrated. And I'm off to drink some more with my uncle. I have a feeling tomorrow is going to be a really long day.


How was your weekend?

Dreaming...

Dreams. I haven't blogged lately about my strange, often vivid dreamscapes. So here's a glimpse on what's been on my mind.

-Greece. Last week I dreamt of visiting Peter, who's my crush in real life and lives in Arizona. But in my dream he lived in Greece. And we were talking on the phone about visiting, and I said, "hunny, do you realize that I'd have to go to another COUNTRY to see you? That's so long. I'd probably have to take two planes."

-B, who is my sorta ex. Yes, we had the label of bf/gf, and then he dumped me and I went to Seattle. And now we're talking again. I saw him last Friday/Saturday. But in the dream, he was going to meet me at the zoo for our date. And he had blonde shaggy hair. Ew. Anyways, I made it to the zoo first, and then saw M, who lived in an apt at the zoo. She invited me in to hang out, so we did. And then I saw B through her window, waiting for me in front of the zoo. Oh, and my cell phone died. So I went out there to see him, and he was really mad at me for being late. And I told him sorry, but he just shrugged me off. His coworker witnessed the this, and after he left, she asked me what happened. "I have no idea. He's mad at me." And then I left her, and returned back to M's where we made grilled cheese and soup because it had started to rain outside.

-Twitter. Seriously over the weekend I had dreams about tweeting, and what if I missed someone's direct message or what if there was ground breaking news that I needed to know? Needless to say, I didn't really sleep well. Damn you Twitter.

Have you had any weird dreams?

Hey shawty

Sometimes I think there's something wrong with the planet, specifically people on this earth.

A week ago, I was hit on by seemingly every guy I came into contact with. Now, don't get me wrong, it's definitely flattering to get hit on. But the guys that hit on me were subpar. I don't understand why I seem to attract older guys, because I look young, certainly not my real age of almost 25. That's for sure.

The common theme here is the bus, folks. Allow me to walk you through my day....

Guy #1, we'll call him Where's Waldo. No, he wasn't wearing stripped apparel, but his glasses were definitely Waldoesque. He was also wearing a scarf and had dirty fingernails and facial hair. Immediately, when I sat down, he looked at me and said hi, and smiled. People here never say hi nor smile, unless you know each other. And I definitely didn't know him. I looked out the window. Then mid-ride he sparks up conversation with me by asking if I know how much a local bus pass is. Yea, he didn't bother to ask the driver who probably would know that information. I make up some answer and continue to stare out the window when he starts talking about how he's new here and that everyone is so nice, and how he left Indiana. Yeah, this conversation was that rivetting...not! Eventually he got off, and I got to my destination.

Then coming back on the bus, another guy who had a ring on his left hand aka married, proceeds to bore me to tears about the newest drinks he's tried and how much he loves cars.
"Have you tried the new cherry pepsi?"
"No, I don't like anything cherry."
"Oh, I get them for free. I like them." :::proceeds to totally check me out:::
"You like the vanilla coke kind?"
"No, I hate vanilla. And Coke. That's too much sugar."
"Haha, I want to try the new diet Pepsi caramel cream."
"That sounds gross."
"Yeah...have you ever been to the car museum?"
"No, cars bore me."
"Oh, they have so many cool cars. I had pictures on my old cell phone."
Silence.
"Yeah, they had this vintage car I wanted."
"Why would you buy a car you can't drive?"
"Because it's so cool!"
Btw, this guy had to be like 40.
"Why don't you buy it then?"
"Because I can't afford it."
Yeah, I know, I'm mean...I get off the bus.
"Have a good day," he says, as he checks me out. Gross!

It's starting to rain when I get off the bus. As I'm waiting to cross the street, I hear "hey, hey you!" I don't turn around. "Hey shawty, where you going?" I turn around to see this big black dude wearing a tight white tee and carrying a huge umbrella.

"Yes?"
"Hey I've seen you around, and I like what I see."
I gave him a blank stare.
"See, you're like a sistah, but you're not." Translation: he likes my ass.
"I want to get to know you." Um. no.
"Why would I go out with you?"
"Why you gotta say it like that??" he pleaded.
"How old do you think I am?"
"20?"
I shook my head no.
"21?""22?""23?"
"24. How old are you?"
"35"
"You're too old."
"No!"
"Yes, that's 10 years difference."
He stomped his foot and said "But you're a grown woman! I just wanna take you out for dinner, get a couple of drinks, show you my place...I want to get to know you. Can I have your number please?"
"I don't do this."
"Here, put it in my phone."
"I gotta go- you're gonna miss your bus."
"Nah, he ain't even started his engine."
"Eh...."
"Please??"
"I'll think about it."
"But how will I see you again?"
"Look for me coming off the bus next week at this time."

And then I ran across the street, and definitely didn't drive today. *sigh*

Gangsta yo!

Weekend Recap

This weekend, I actually made plans, and did something(s) and felt like my age again. Hallelujah!

Allow me to recap....

Friday: Left work at 2:30 to drink. Our art director demanded we go out for a drink on him. Plus my boss was out of town, so that didn't hurt either. Had a Mothership Wit with coworkers, then headed home, where I got all beautified for my date. yes, I had a date. Went out to dinner where I had spaghetti & meatballs, followed by wine & strawberry shortcake. It was a good night.

Saturday: Had lunch at a new bbq place and then met up with M for pedicures. I was going to choose my predictable color - pink - but decided last minute to be a rebel and opted for the aqua blue color. The chairs were comfy, and it was relatively inexpensive. M and I walked to the 7-11 and grabbed drinks...I was really craving a slurpee! That was pure yumminess. We walked to Tony's market, walked around the store, admired all the pretty displays of food, and even got a free wine tasting. Score. On our way out, it decided to downpour. M pulled out her umbrella, and we decided to make a run for it. Afterall, we only had to go 3 blocks, how bad could that be? BAD, I tell ya. We made it about a block and a half before it started to HAIL, and two people sharing an umbrella made for one doesn't quite work out. Luckily we found shelter underneath a tree, but by that point, we were both soaked. So we decided to run the last block in the rain/hail, and the entire time I couldn't stop laughing hysterically. We dried off at M's place, and then went out to dinner at Pete's Greektown Cafe. I've been craving their pita bread since like two months ago. Overall, it was a great night.

Sunday: I didn't go to church. Instead I went to the pool and swam for a couple hours before it started to rain, and hail. again. I'm starting to get used to these summer storms. I was going to meet up with friends to go to jazz in the park, but due to another last minute rain storm, we opted to go for boba tea instead. I tried a new flavor- taro.

This is what it looks like.

I usually stick with mango, or passionfruit, but this was decent. It reminded me of almond biscotti. It was good to catch up with people- we even reminisced about our childhood toys, which I think is funny because that's one of the trending topics today on Twitter is #iremember.

It was a good weekend - how was yours?

Oh high school...

Tonight I might be meeting up with an old classmate from high school. Actually, I went to grade school with him too, but he didn't graduate with me. He's in town because his dad is undergoing kidney surgery. He's married, btw. We got in touch earlier this year via Facebook, and have talked a few times on the phone.

Part of me is nervous to see him and meet his wife. I don't want to feel like the third wheel, but at the same time, I am curious to see her. And he never really comes into town, so I should take advantage of his time here and catch up. Right?

But here's the thing. I have this big schtik about meeting people from high school. I refuse to go to my 10 year reunion, which is coming up in 2012. Yes, do the math. I was class of '02 baby! One of my good friends, one of them that I still talk with, was our class president, and has the job of planning that. Even knowing she's planning it, you couldn't pay me to go. I'm sure I'll hear all about it anyways.

Plus, I really don't see the point. You know that there will be the skinny cheerleader types turned fat, the dorky guy turned hott, and the jocks will still think they are the best at everything. There will be the people who brag about their $100,000+ a year jobs, show off their beautiful husbands/wives, and talk about their fabulous lives. And then there will be the people who are miserable, still single, and don't have a great life. Yup, that's what I envision a high school reunion to be. Could I be wrong? Sure. But I bet you, I'm at least 50% right on the money. Even on Facebook, it seems like most of my high school class is on there now- it's like the beginning of a virtual reunion. I've seen some people from h.s. who never used to talk or were in different social circles, who regularly comment and write on each others walls. It's mind boggling. I do have some "friends" from high school on there, but most of them are on limited profile, so they can't see everything like my status. Which is how I like it. I don't want them to know what I've been up to. It's none of their business.

I'm aware that most of my graduating class still lives here. But I still feel like they invade my territory when I see them out and about sometimes. For example, twice now when I've been out downtown, I've seen someone from high school. I know I can't avoid downtown. I've seen people at church before, or at the mall. The last thing I want to do is talk to them, so I usually just avoid them like the plague, unless I'm spotted. If they see me, I'll make polite small talk and then immediately call M and gossip. Haha, I'm so mature.

I'm completely opposite of my brother, who went to the same high school as I did. He looks forward to getting together with his h.s. friends, and can't understand why I avoid mine. The main reason is that I've changed since high school. I'm no longer the quiet, studious, goody too shoes, type of girl. For one thing, I'm definitely not studious anymore, and I am a lot more talkative. I mean, I freaking went to Paris last year with just a few friends. When my hairstylist heard about it from my mom, she was so surprised. I'm sure she told her daughter, who was in my class. But back to the topic. I feel like meeting those people from high school would just suck me back in time to when I was in high school. And that isn't what I want. I don't want to have to prove to them that I have changed. I don't want to overcompensate and be completely different. I just want to be myself. And with my closest friends (some of them are from high school, some from college), I can be that person.

Am I crazy to want to live in the present and not associate with high school people? Or should I stop being so immature, and give them a chance?

Weekend Recap

We had some crazy weather here, including some tornadoes and baseball sized hail. Luckily, I didn't get any of that action- I was comfy and warm inside, watching the rain fall. I did attempt to go to the pool this weekend, but it wasn't meant to be. Everytime I'd want to go in, the sun would hide behind the clouds. I can't wait till it's full on summer here so I can lay out and swim at my own leisure.

Other than swimming, I finally made it to church. I haven't gone in awhile. I also played big sister and ran my lil brother around to various birthday parties. I didn't make it to jazz at the park. I decided the weather was too crappy, but I'm dead set on going next Sunday.

How was your weekend?

I'm cheap, I'll admit it

The best part about Sundays besides sleeping in is looking at the ads. I love getting up and looking at the Sunday paper because of the coupons. I have a thing for coupons. I always have. I don't know if I got it from my grandma, but I know for sure I didn't inherit it from my mother. She thinks I'm crazy. And maybe I am acting like an old person by clipping out coupons every week, but I happen to enjoy it.

I get real satisfaction when I save money, even if it's just .35 cents off a candy bar, or a box of pasta. I even use coupons at the store. New York & Company is a big weakness of mine. I constantly have coupons in my inbox from them. And my newest obsession is Old Navy Weekly, because they make hunting for the coupons like a scavenger hunt, and I play to win. For example, by clicking on the fire pit, I got a 15% off coupon. But I know I can do better, so I clicked around, and upgraded my coupon to $5 off my purchase of $50 or more. I'm just getting started...

I realize that I am a prime example of advertising and marketing working at its best, but as long as I am saving money, I don't mind at all.

What's your newest obsession?

TMI Thursday: Spit or Swallow?

**Alright, folks, you know the rules. Join us all in humiliating the crap out of yourself every Thursday by sharing some completely tasteless, wholly unclassy, "how many readers can I estrange THIS week??" TMI story about your life. Or hell, about someone else's! For more TMI head over to Lilu's***

I'm popping my TMI cherry today with a post that isn't for the faint of heart.

Keep in mind two things -

1. I can't spit to save my life. I blame this entirely on my mom. When I was little and tried to spit, she always scolded me, saying "Ladies don't spit. Go brush your teeth."
2. I hate puking. Like HATE it. I usually only puke when I'm hungover. Which as been a lot lately. But the main reason I hate puking is because I tend to pee. I just can't help it. Guess I need to do more Kegel exercises.

This all happened on Monday. As you all know, I've been sick, and had a terrible cough. Well I woke up at 4:40 a.m. because I had to pee. I had drank too much water the night before. I rolled out of bed and as I'm going pee, I notice that I need to blow my nose. I reach over and grab some toilet paper, blow my nose as hard as I can, and flush.

Then I started to cough, Only this wasn't just a baby cough. Oh no, this was a horrible cough, the kind that makes your abs clench and your entire body shake. I stood up, thinking that would help. But of course it didn't. Instead, I proceeded to cough even harder, so hard in fact, that my face is now red, I'm crossing my legs to make sure I don't pee, and I have tears running down my cheeks. But I can't stop coughing. At this point, I know I'm about to cough up something nasty. So what's a girl to do? Swallow or spit? Well, I opted for spitting, but everytime I would try to spit, it wouldn't come out. It was like stuck in the middle of my throat.

Which made me think about how as a kid I wanted to invent this suction that you could stick in the back of your throat, which would suck up all the mucus, similar to the suction at the dentist. I mean how freakin' cool would that be? But I digress.

Finally I coughed so hard that I knew the mucus (I hate using the word phlegm, it sounds so proper) was about to come out. I spit as hard as I could three times, yielding next to nothing. And then the big one came. As I gagged, I tasted the nastiest shit in my entire life. And I spit it out in one big, green, quarter-sized puddle of mucus into the sink. Splat. I wiped the tears from my cheeks, and took a look at it. It was so so gross. Fucking nasty. So I turned on the water full blast hoping to wash it down the drain. Only it stuck to the sink like nobody's business. It didn't move. It was then that I did what any sane person would do. I picked it up. I scrunched my nose in disgust, felt its slimy texture, threw it into the toilet, and flushed.

Happy TMI Thursday!

Freebies

Also, get a free root beer float today at Sonic from 8 p.m. till midnight.

The throat culture came back negative. Yay! Now if I could just stop coughing....