The Dangers of the Microwave

So today I learned first hand about the dangers of the microwave. While at work, a friendly neighbor asked me if I wanted a cookie. Apparently they had a whole tin full of homemade goodies. That they froze to keep fresh. Of course me being a fat kid, I pounced on the opportunity to spoil my lunch and said yes. I chose a huge oatmeal raisin pecan one. "Just nuke it in the microwave," said the nice neighbor. "Ok, will do." She left the kitchen and I promptly put the frozen cookie on a plate and hit 30 seconds. The center of the cookie was inflated and warm but the rest of it was cold as a rock. So I figured, ok 2 minutes. Then the entire cookie should be warm and gooey and yummy. Right?


Wrong. About halfway into my allotted time, I noticed "steam" coming from the cookie. So I stopped the time at after a minute, thinking it probably just needed to air out. Nope. Apparently one of the raisins in the center of the cookie decided to burn. I literally had a smoke signal coming out of the center of my cookie. Panicked, because I didn't want anyone to see or smell my burning cookie, I blew as fast as I could, thinking it would just stop smoking. No such luck. Then I decided to stick my finger on top of the burnt raisin. And promptly learned that it was too hot and burned my index finger. Finally, I decided to just run out of the front doors, cookie and plate in hand, and wait outside for it to cool off. After all, it was only like oh, 15 degrees out. After standing outside freezing for what seemed like forever, but in reality was only two minutes, I snuck back into the office. I didn't even smell any smoke.

I congratulated myself on a job well done. That is until lunchtime came around and I needed to heat up my soup. When I opened the microwave door, I totally smelled my burnt cookie. Oops.