Tuesday, April 27, 2010

Don't be a fake friend

Remember when I blogged about my "friend" and former coworker? You all pretty much agreed with me that she's not really putting our friendship first. Well, she's back again. I randomly got an IM from her on Facebook yesterday asking if I was at work. I didn't respond. Then she texted me asking me the same thing. Again, I didn't respond. And then she sent this email...to which I didn't respond to.

What U been up to? Its been a while since we talked. I was thinking about going to Boulder sometime this week to try and have lunch with DJ and I thought it would be cool to go to the mall, maybe hang out on your break or something? Have you's moved to a new office yet?

Anyway....I was wondering if you could do me a favor? I found this PERFECT opportunity for me in Boulder. The ____ is looking for a Production Manager. I saw their ad here on Craigslist and emailed the editor my resume and cover letter on the day they posted it (4/12) but I haven't heard anything yet (its on their website here too...they are looking for Freelance Designers too!) . This would be sooo perfect...their office is literally right across the street from where DJ works! And I know I can do it...I was the production manager at the American Classifieds/Thrifty Nickel in Denver before I started working with ___.

I don't have you down as a reference but I would like you to be seeing as though the references I am using now, only 1 is really reachable seems....anyway....I was wondering if you can maybe call (if you thinks its a good idea) and see if they are still accepting applications for the position because you have a friend and former colleague that you think would fit this position perfectly (as if you dont know I have applied for it already)....you know its been 3 weeks since posting it and would like to professionally recommend me for the position? Perhaps...I dont know if its a good I idea but I do know that its REALLY competitive out there and maybe a pro recommendation might increase my odd? I really want this job. The say the Pay is negotiable but I dont know what their lowest is...i hope I can get at LEAST what I was making at ___....but I would love this job......the number to the paper is 303-494-5511. The editor's extension is #162.

Think its a good idea? Could it hurt? I dont know...All i know is this is the most PERFECT opportunity that I have been able to find and if I can at least get an interview....i'd be happy.....sort of....lol....

Working at home is really hard with a little one...who is not so little anymore? Auggie will be walking soon....another reason I want to meet up with you, cuz you havent seen him since Keri's Baby Shower. He is teething really bad this week...top 4 teeth are coming out...its been rough! Anyway.....let me know what u think. K... miss ya!

Sincerely,

Fake Friend

Clearly, she only will talk to me when she wants something--in this case it appears to be a reference. And second of all, who does that? I mean who asks someone to call a potential employer and basically name drop? Um, not me! My mom of course thought I was being rash, but I take my friendships seriously, and in the past I've gotten taken advantage of because I'm too nice. In this case, I feel justified for not responding to her.

What do you think? What would you do?

10 comments:

Just A Girl said...

Wooow. That's ballsy, and really, really rude. "Oh hi, let's have lunch but in the meantime, could you call this place for me?" You should send her an email back saying, "No, I'm not willing to do that. Any of it."

Wonderful said...

JAG- I seriously agree with you. I just hate hate hate that people do this all the time--they just use people for their own good. I personally don't even feel like responding, but I am like the queen at passive aggressiveness so I'm sure I could whip out a professional email saying "screw you."

imerika said...

dude no way.

she obviously is just using you. people like this don't know the real meaning of friendship. I've just learned to keep them at a distance.

Anonymous said...

:( Sad to report...I have done this lately. I mean, I didn't go to the great lengths FF did with regards to guilt tripping and gave said person an out and admitted i hadn't talked to them in a while. But I didn't apologize for not being in touch. And I did ask for a favor.

Needless to say this person has not gotten back in touch with me. The question now is...do I need to apologize? Or just leave him alone?

- M

Wonderful said...

Imerika- I'm so glad you agree with me! I'm definitely keeping her at a distance!

M- Well, I think it depends on what kinda favor you asked for, but knowing you, I'm sure you didn't do anything nearly as offensive as Fake Friend did. I would just follow up and be like, "hey, did you get my email the other day? I totally understand if you don't wanna help me out...I just was wondering..." or something along those lines.

hellotaylor said...

Wow, that's ridiculous. Really. You should tell her exactly how you feel about the entire situation.

Wonderful said...

Taylor- I probably should. But I'm not going to right now because I don't feel like it. I'll do it like next week or something and just be like oh, no thanks. byeeee. h

Linda's TV said...

It must be hard to have a friend (or, at this point, "friend") who constantly does this. Anyway, her behavior is pretty telling about why she is currently unemployed. I'd just ignore her email and pretend you never got it. Sooner or later she'll get the msg and stop asking you for stuff.

Wonderful said...

Linda- I like the way you think. I've already ignored her pleas yesterday and so it'd be really irrelevant at this point if I were to all of a sudden respond. So, I'm just gonna let it go, and if she brings it up again, I'll give her a piece of my mind.

Andhari said...

You don't need people like these in your life. Such a leech. She's just gonna be wasting your time and hurt you :(